Reality of Middle School

And the Pharisees and their scribes grumbled at his disciples, saying "Why do you eat and drink with tax collectors and sinners?" And Jesus answered them, "Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. I have not come to call the righteous but sinners to repentance." - Luke 5:30-32 (ESV)

Occasionally I enter into the crazy world known as the middle school cafeteria. It is a humbling experience, and gives me much insight into the world of the students I work with. This is a part of the students everyday life, something I am privileged to see a side of, apart from a church meeting, where its not just Christian friends, or church kids. Its a whole pot of people, from the preppy kids, to the "emo" kids, to those who are socially awkward, to the kids who have disabilities. And it gives me insight to a world full of people who are all the same: in need of the love of Christ.

I always get the weird stares, but I also get the connection gained with consistency. There are some kids whose names I forget, but who know me as the "guy with cool converse" or as Arty, since I bear some resemblance to this character from the tv hit Glee. I see my students, and I see my students friends, and I see students whom I would otherwise have no connection with. It brings joy now that I hear cries of "Brummy!" and my best little 7th grade lunch table always makes me laugh, and hopefully not get in trouble.

Today, however, I had a conversation with an 8th grade student about the reality of middle school. He asked me to pray for him, the last words I would expect to hear at a middle school lunch table, let alone inside a church from an 8th grade guy. And yet, he asked me to pray for him. And he began to talk about the reality of middle school: the kid who was under house arrest and no one knew why, and didn't blame it on the kid but on his tough situation. That he couldn't define any person as a "good" person in his grade, a reality that hit me.

I also briefly talked to a table which had intimidated me, it was the 8th grade wrestling team, the guys who looked like they should be in high school. But one kid waved me over briefly. And I realized, all these kids are just searching out for the same thing: a sense of love and purpose which hasn't been found in anything their friends of school has offered. Its a sense which I hope I resonate, because it took me forever to find. The love of Christ, and redemption through his sacrifice is the only place one can find purpose, wholeness, and meaning. These kids don't see many adults who would choose to be there. I get confused with a lunch monitor, to which I respond, I am not. I work at a church and I'm just here visiting because I want to. I don't want to preach at them, don't want to convert them. I want my actions to display what I believe. If all I have are words, then I've missed something. Jesus didn't just say he loved us, he demonstrated it. In the same way, I see a lot of kids who may have heard church lingo, heard people say they're loved or to live a certain way, but how many see it being lived out?

I'll be honest, it sucks sometimes. But these kids need people who willingly choose to be a part of their lives, outside of the church walls, outside of small group. Saying, you matter to me more than an hour on Sunday or Wednesday, because to God you matter more than that. Which is why I'll text, I'll facebook, I'll tweet, I'll skype, because it allows me to communicate with them. To let them know they matter beyond what they think, beyond what they have perceived from the church in the past. That I'm not going to be afraid to enter into their world, because they need someone to. They need someone to come in and show them the love of Jesus. That person who is willing to sit down and eat with them, talk with them, play video games with them. Even when someone would say, dude you're 22, get a life. Dude, you're a mom, just worry about your own kids. Dude, no kid wants to hang with you. Dude, you can't really do anything for them. Dude, they're a lost cause. Don't fall for this, don't let fear or intimidation stop you.

There is a world of people looking to be shown what it means to follow Christ, who need to see what the love of Christ looks like in everyday life. Most of them live right next door to you. Its easy to board a plane, and yes its needed. But look at your friends, the kids on your block, who need that person to shine a light for Christ in their lives.

- Brummy

No Bull...

This past week has been crazy. This past month has been crazy. I have learned a lot, I have had my ups, had my downs. And all I anticipate as the holidays move forward is more craziness. Perhaps in my life directly, more likely in the lives of those I am in contact with on a daily basis.

However, the one thing I have been learning is this: being real matters.

Students have many questions, they have things they hear at school, from friends, from the media, things which may seem "unchurch" topics. And yet, what topic is not a "church" topic? Things we would deem not to talk about, for example: bestiality. Funny, God talks about this.

Leviticus 18:23, Exodus 22:19, and Leviticus 20:16 all hit this topic. These laws, setting in place the understanding that sex with animals was wrong was put in place by God because the gentile world was under the impression that these things were alright. But see, God doesn't just say "don't do it." There is a define for what sex is, in what context it is intended, and that it is a good thing. This is just an example, but it is the concept I am trying to hit on. The Bible addressees, quite frankly, something today we would say "Don't even mention in the church!" Is it awkward to talk about? Yes! But here is the deal: there are things the world talks about, talks about frankly, and gives its input on. So why should the church hush the questions, frank as they may be, on certain topics? Because they make us feel uncomfortable? What is uncomfortable is knowing that there are thousands of youth who walk into churches every day with the impression they must put on a mask, that they cannot be real, talk about things they hear at school, hear from those who have dealt with these things before or who can give insight on these things.

In my conversations with students, I seek out truth and honesty. I set in place a circle of trust, meaning what is shared is shared in confidence. There are no dumb questions. And also no bull*. Lets be real. If something is going on, if you have a question ask it. God knows your heart, your mind, what is going on. Why, then, should we be afraid to hear these questions? Or to ask them? Or to share? It may not be an easy conversation, but we aren't meant to be the geniuses, to have all the answers. Point to Christ, to the Word of God. Let God speak, let His truth shine.

- Brummy

The Harvest is Plentiful, the Laborers Few

Then he said to his disciples, "The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few; therefore pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into his harvest." - Matthew 9:37-38 (ESV)

Let me make something clear: I don't do my job because its fun. Secondly, I don't really consider it a job. I hope you don't see it only as some 20 something who doesn't want to grow up so he plays with nerf guns, plays video games, listens to rap music, etc. I am here because of Christ, and its not easy. Each week there are times I question myself, I am discouraged. And each week I am forced to cling to Christ.

I come in contact with numerous middle school and high school students throughout the week. I don't count just those who walk through the walls on Sunday (church is not defined, in my mind as once a week, or within the walls of a building.) If I have a conversation over a lunch table, that is "church." If I talk with a student at tutoring, someone who may never walk into our building, that is church. And I look and see so many students within this area of Stark County who are broken, who are hurting, who are waiting for someone to show them the love of Christ.

You're scared to? You don't think you can relate to students? Its not about relating. This weekend I sat down with a student from an inner city ministry who was at the same retreat as us. I didn't know him. He was 15 and in the 8th grade, from foster care, and a bit awkward to talk to. It was awkward to get him to respond. But see, he needed to see the love of Christ. Was it comfortable to sit down next to him? NO! But when were we ever called to be comfortable?

If you want comfort, sit your fat butt in a lazy-boy all day. But that's not being a christian. Sitting in the pew each Sunday, yeah its great. I love gathering and worshipping with you all. Its important. But more important is this: we cannot lose sight of the world around us. We aren't called to separate ourselves, in fact we are called to go INTO THE WORLD!


I see a lot of kids who only know brokenness, who only know hurt, pain, feeling alone. Who don't know the love of Christ. Correction: they don't see the love of Christ. It must be more than words, it must be more than handing them a Bible, more than handing them a tract (these things may go hand in hand, and not going to say God can't use them) but in reality they need to see a display of this love we speak of, which has redeemed us.

I challenge you, where are you displaying the love of Christ which you claim? At work? At home? At school? There are hundreds of middle school students who need to be shown the love of Christ. How many are willing to step up and take that challenge. To stop being comfortable, and start being real. Christ wasn't comfortable on the cross. Why do we think we should be comfortable as Christians, when there is a multitude of those in desperate need of the love of Christ.

Will you come alongside and show that love, share it through your actions, through all you do. It's not easy, but its not about what's easy. I am not here because its easy, because I like it. My passion is only because of what Christ has done in me. And I look and pray for those who will step up, who will get thats its not about liking it, about being perfectly relatable to middle school students. But who see a generation desperately in need of the love of Christ.

- Brummy

Live as You Are Called

"Only let each person lead the life that the Lord has assigned to him, and to which God has called him. This is my rule in all the churches." - 1 Corinthians 7:17 (ESV)

Many wonder how or why I do middle school ministry. And I will tell you. Because I see it as one of the most important and critical time periods in a persons life. These years, in my personal opinion, are critical in that a person begins to make choices which will stick with them the rest of their life. Entering into 6th grade you begin to leave childhood behind, and exiting 8th grade your feet are beginning to be set on paths which you will follow into your adult life.

It is here that the world throws things at you: sex, drugs, porn, alcohol, status, fame, depression, eating disorders. And I look and say: how can one not see this critical time. Because while the world is throwing these things, there is still the sense of childlike innocence, still the ear willing to listen, the voice wanting to be heard.

You may see these kids as kids: telling poop jokes, farting, not paying attention. And I have seen them as God's beloved children: lost in a very big world, reaching out. Asking questions about God. Seeking to find love and answers to why they feel a certain way. Afraid to ask questions because for some reason, adults don't think its okay to question things. Read the Psalms. How many times did the Psalmists cry out to God, asking why He had abandoned them. Yet it all came back to hope: knowing that God would never forsake them. This is the hope, the only thing I can offer, to middle school students. And this is why middle school ministry, in my mind, is real ministry. God loves these students where they are at. He doesn't need them to be more theologically sound. Because God doesn't need anything from us. And He doesn't love you or me more because we "know" more than a middle schooler does.

I wouldn't trade what I am doing now for anything. I have no plans of moving on, because to me, there is no moving on. I get that maybe you haven't been called to work with youth, or middle school. But please do not let that degrade the calling God has given someone else. I am not called to adults (at this moment, and it doesn't mean I don't have ministry there. My focus, however is on middle school students and the adults in their lives.) yet you may be called there. Let each person lead the life that the Lord has assigned to him. And let us not diminish the individual callings God has placed on each of us. I am only Matt Brumfield, and I don't expect you to be me, nor should you expect me to be you. We are individuals, broken and wretched, yet used by God for His glory.

He has given me a passion for middle school students. I pray wherever your passion is, in Christ, you would use it for His glory. And do it well, where he has called you, not looking down on another, but celebrating and embracing where each other has been called.

- Brummy

Heroes

My life is not ordinary. No, not because I sometimes mask myself in bright orange skihats and call myself "The Viking" cleverly screaming about how I am going to defend North Canton of all evil (especially rival villains from Jackson and Lake.) Yes, most of my interactions are with those in 6th, 7th, and 8th grade, but my days are not spent inside a school building.

And this particular Wednesday evening was filled with masked, caped, hooded, tight-wearing superheros. Of the middle school variety. A few dozen middle school students stepping up to the challenge of coming up with their best copy-cat or unique superhero character. And I was reminded why I love my life.

Most weeks go like this (minus the superhero-ness.) I am blessed to speak into the lives of numerous middle school students. I serve as the Director of Middle School at The Chapel in North Canton. Regardless of where you stand on religion, I am blessed to be able to come alongside parents in the stark county area and assist them in bringing up their children. Yes, I have a passion for Jesus, and because of that a passion to love these families and students.

Our superhero night was a time to be goofy, and it was. We threw marshmallows into plungers (an awesome game I thought up a few minutes before the event started. It could have totally failed, but was actually a hit.) We enjoyed random dance parties to this new trending "Interlude" dance (a hit coming from colleges which has now been tradition as part of our middle school gatherings each Sunday and mid-week.) And I was also blessed to just take time to be with these students.

Towards the end we talked about heroes. We all have them. I was humbled to hear some of them share the names of various leaders in our community they look up to, and was humbled to hear some say my name. And I realized what responsibility that is. In the midst of this goofy time of wearing tights (which I too wore, underneath my athletic shorts) dancing to crazy techno songs, and eating ice cream covered in way too many toppings, I have the unique opportunity to be a part of these students lives at this critical time.

Too often middle schoolers are overlooked as kids, which a part of them still are, but many are faced with huge villains in their lives. Villains such as the death of their pet, bullies at school, their parents divorce, trying to live up to the social images the world portrays (which leads to eating disorders, bodily self-harm, depression, etc.) And I realize that they need more heroes in their lives. They need other adults who will truly understand them for where they are, that they are facing very really, very big, and very scary villains. And I personally believe they need to meet the greatest hero of all time, who made the ultimate sacrifice for us all, out of love. Jesus. Who loves them amidst their villains, their struggles, and their goofy, cape wearing, voice cracking, awkward dancing, middle school natures.

So each week I enjoy times of goofyness. Times of epic nerf wars, and pottery painting sessions. And am reminded of how much these students are facing, and how deeply they need to know they are loved for who they are and where they are at right now.

Why We Can't Overlook Middle Schoolers

"Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity." - 1 Timothy 4:12

I spent the weekend with over 150 middle school students, 30 some of them from the youth group I shepherd. I was blessed to have my group for the weekend consist of 6 middle school boys whom I was able to lead in the activities and lead in discussion after each session. And the weekend reminded me why the church needs those who are invested in the day to day lives of students in 6, 7, and 8 grade.

Going into the weekend I knew I had students who are in the midst of parents fighting every day. I knew I had students who wonder each day whether they are loved by their father or loved by their mother. I had students whom I knew were trying to figure out what is happening to them, why they are changing, what these emotions are they are feeling, why they aren't little kids anymore. And I had students who I knew desperately needed those to love them for who they are, for where they are, and to show them God's love.

There were 20 minutes on Saturday where the students were released to the camp to take time alone to spend with God. I walked and prayed as I watched the students curl up on rocks, sit on swings, on logs, alone in the cold and the dark. And yet not alone, embraced by the arms of a God who loves them. I saw students kneeling, saw students with hands raised and eyes lifted to heaven. And I prayed, I prayed. And I knew, God was moving.

As the minutes faded and my sixth graders entered the cabin, I began to ask them how their time went. And God revealed to me how He had moved. A student shared how he surrendered his life fully to Christ, began to share the realizations which God showed him, things in his life which don't line up with following God. That its not a Sunday thing, but an every day thing. We had deep conversations about how every girl is a daughter of God, and God is one father with a shotgun you don't want to mess with. I had another student break down in tears and got to talk and pray with him about his relationship with his dad. And I realized while I had the opportunity to spend a weekend with a few of these middle schoolers, there are hundreds more in Stark County which we overlook. We look down on, we despise because they are young.

Was the weekend full of poop stories? Of farting? Of smelliness? Of a giant, freezing mud pit? YES! But going through this with them, allowing them to be themselves, meeting them where they are at. It is what Christ calls us to. And I sit and realize how blessed I am to work with this age, to be able to speak into their lives at this critical age. This is when they are beginning to make decision about the rest of their lives. Not at 15. Not at 16. Not at 18. Not at 25. Yes, they make decisions, but it begins NOW, at age 11 and 12. And they get it, if you give them a chance to speak, if you take a moment to listen. To giggle with them, to fart with them, to laugh about the time you pooped your pants. And to be messy beside them, to be real.

If we are willing to come alongside them as they are, laugh with them, cry with them, and listen, God will use us. God will use you. I have seen more evidence of those truly striving to live for Christ in my incoming sixth grade class this year then I often see in the adult community (not intending to be disrespectful) But when a sixth grader makes a realization they need to change things in their lives, you know God is active. And when they share that they know it will be hard, but that they have to. Well let me tell you. They are setting the example. Will we follow it? And will we follow the example of Christ? Will we be willing to get messy. Because these students need us now. At this age. High School is critical, but in my eyes, from my experience, if we wait until then, its often too late.

God has placed on my heart a passion for middle school ministry, for middle school students, for high school students, for the world. I pray we wouldn't overlook this age group though, just because we think they are smelly, they are kids, or they are annoying. Because they are very much in need of God's love, and to be loved. They are very much dealing with more than we could possibly imagine. And God is very much working and using them at their age. Because they are willing, often more willing than us. And that is beautiful.

- Brummy

What We Need

Today began with worries of how I would make it in to work. I have been without a car of my own since Thursday. But God provides.

And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.

- Philippians 4:19 (ESV)

Funny how true this has been. I was blessed to be able to use a car of a church members this weekend, and today I was picked up as I walked down Main Street in North Canton by another church member and dropped at the church. I was then able to find a ride later to a local middle school where I began tutoring. As I walked up, the students were all rushing to reach their buses and I grinned as my heart beat in my chest, a bit nervous. It was, after all, my "first day" at school. After being sent three different places I stumbled upon about 60 students sitting in the theater. I smiled as after being introduced a few kids introduced themselves, most just asking where I went to school, if I was in my teens (ooh yah I still look young even with a beard...er maybe because they know I can't grow one!) My heart instantly went out to all the students, and I knew just from being there a few minutes these next weeks through May would be amazing.

As I walked down through the school with the students, I engaged in light conversation by many, helped a few 5th grade girls know it was ok to stay with the line of students, even though we were walking through the boys locker room. Oh the fears of an adolescent. Once in the room, kids talked loudly as they found chairs and I realized it was myself and another school staff member trying to work and control these students. And I couldn't be happier, and yet more sad. As I looked I called out in my head, guessing what each student's story was. I could tell those who were from broken homes, those who had no friends, those who I knew desperately tried to fit in, those who wanted to be seen as "men" because it was important for them to be tough. I guess its my gift, I can usually tell what someone is going through, at least have a pretty good idea. And it was great as the students slowly opened up. Thats what's great about my job, and working with middle school students. They get around to liking you pretty quick.

And I sat and realized how blessed I am, and just why God has placed me here in North Canton. Its sad to see how many churches are in the area, and yet as I have begun to seek out relationships in the community, I wonder how many are involved outside their walls? (And I do not at all mean this to be a blog against those, I love the local church leaders here. I am blessed to be a part of a great church community.) But I stop and say, look at the need here. Look at these kids who just need someone to love them. Do we even understand the reason many of these students act out is because at home they have no attention? At home they are over-looked. When a teacher has to ask what a mothers last name is now, what does it say about the male figures in their lives? And I wonder and pray, will our generation fall into the same pattern.

And I stop and realize I am so amazingly blessed to be able to spend time with these students. I'm not looking to say anything to them. I want to listen, to know them. They don't need anyone else to tell them what to do. They have enough people telling them to do things, but no one listening to them, helping them sort through, and showing them what to do.

Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.

- 1 John 3:18 (ESV)

I wonder where we forget passages like this? Our words have truth when there are actions behind them reflecting and speaking for them. If I'm truly about Christ, I will be there to listen to these students. I will put up with their little antics because, lets face it: they aren't adults yet. But sadly, they are forced to deal with adult situations. I wonder how many of these students have been told "I Love You." by any adult. And yet, I could probably count (with a calculator) how many times they have been told "Don't do that." It's easier to tell them not to do something, than for someone to actually care and listen. And, sometimes, just let them be kids.

I am excited for this year. I am excited for my students I see every Sunday. I am excited for these new students I will be in contact with every week. Because for me, I am not called to sit behind the walls of a church office. I am not called to be a light in a church office. (Well, its not the extent of it) I am called to be in the community. People don't want to hear us talk about God, don't want to just see us walk into a church. They want to see us be active among them, where they are at.

When he saw the crowds, he had compassion for them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.

- Matthew 9:36

I see many sheep who are without a shepherd. I am beginning to see God has placed me here to watch over these students. To be a light for Him here in this community, in these schools. To these families. So that even if they haven't heard someone say "I Love You" they would know, there is one greater than any on this earth who so desperately wants you to know "I LOVE YOU."