This was my last spring break. And I spent it with three amazing friends backpacking in the wilderness of West Virginia. We were so excited, spending days before looking at trails, checking out pictures of Dolly Sods Wilderness. None of these things at all prepared us for what was to come. We had some concept, each of us carrying our own notion of what it would be like to pack for three days in the wilderness. Yet when we got there, our preconceived notions were tested, our ability to fight to make it, even stay alive, was tested. Reflecting on it now, I see it mirrors a lot of everyday lives, including those of the middle school students I am in contact with every week.
We sit in our churches, our small groups, and we discuss with students Christ, we give glimpses of Christ and glimpses of the trials of the real world, but when they hit those trials they are much, much different than what they had conceived sitting in a church. We can speak of resisting temptation, we can share our stories of wrong choices, but it is only like looking at a photograph of a trail online. It can only give you a glimpse of what is to come. It can in no way completely prepare you. So how can we prepare?
The one thing which we were prepared was the concept of being in it together. Whether or not any of us knew where the trail was leading, we fought it out together. We were all cold, some colder than others. But we were in it together. We literally had to carry the pack of a friend when he admitted (since before he had refused us) that if we didn't help, he would pass out soon. I realized that we must break out from beyond the walls of the church and home groups, and be a buddy on the trail, encouraging and helping them cross the streams. Even when the boots slip and get wet, (a.k.a. they mess up) we can't leave them stranded in the wilderness. There is a huge difference between being there for someone when they are at "base camp" (the church, youth group, small group) and when they are out on the "trail" which is the real world. Once they are out in the wilderness, they must fight on. And they have two choices. Attempt to make it back to base camp, or keep wandering until they go numb and fade away. Too often we fear leaving "base camp" to risk getting muddy, getting cold, and getting our boots wet. Yet they need us, need us out their with them. Encouraging them to push their way through the woods, through the snow, to make it home again.
Students want someone who cares about them even when they seem to be stuck in the wilderness. They need someone to help them navigate not just pre-trip but during the trip and after the trip. We can't be afraid to be with them on the trail they walk, the paths they choose. Maybe we don't like it, but if we won't help them navigate on the trail then they will never find their way back again. It's easy to stay at "base camp" all the time. It's comfortable. It's without risk. But the beauty of being on the trail is a sense of adventure, a sense of risk, of the bond it forms, even when tempers flare, hopes fade, in the end, to know you walked alongside them, that you got your feet wet with them, that you carried their pack when they felt like they would collapse under it. That will mean more than a smiling face waving if they ever found their way back to base camp on their own.
Students need us to be involved in their lives outside of the church. To care about them, to be invested in them. Even if they resist help, to be willing and know that when they reach that breaking point, we are right there next to them to help carry them and continue to point them to Christ. To show them Christ. Not just tell them about it, and then make them wander on their own.
- Brummy
